NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) - In a move that took many in the publishing industry by surprise, the vibrator of former Miss California Carrie Prejean signed a deal today to write a tell-all memoir.

The book, tentatively titled Still Buzzing, will offer what the publisher called a "vibrator's eye view" of the scandals and controversies that have dogged Ms. Prejean.

At a press conference in New York, the vibrator said it would reveal little-known episodes from Ms. Prejean's life, such as when pageant officials tried to strip her of her fake breasts and award them to her runner-up.

For her part, Ms. ...

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